a day like a year

holy fucking christ. so tired. but oh the wonder s hot shower does. oh, so drained, especially in the emotional sense, like someone stuck a siphon in my heart and sucked. beginning at the beginning..... prom was pretty fun actually. Aside from the struggle to keep my dress up over my tits, i think i looked pretty damn good. I know most everyone else did. at least at first. by the end of the dance, there was some disheveledness going on. Molly was a pretty cool date, we slowdanced and everything, though when i let her lead she basically just swayed around in circles. which was fun, if dizzying. the dj was pretty bad, no surprise, but i love to dance so whatever right? Where the complications came in were with C, whose date danced with him almost not at all. it's not that she's entirely disagreeable, just that she makes him unhappy, and i can't fucking stand it. he deserves so much better in terms of treatment and it seems like she doesn't even try to hide her disregard for his feelings. i just want to slap her sometimes, slap her profusely. All he does is try, and she doesn't. grrrrrrrrrrr. i just wish i could help somehow, or do something other tham fume on the sidelines. and it is my fucking business, because he's my friend and i adore him. So there was that. then ... dan was being annoying. hosting a party and all was really cool of him, but it got so huge that towards the end everyone sort of want to get the hell out of the woods in michigan. Not that he noticed since he spent most of the time in bed with his girlfriend. i guess i can sort of understand that, but it made things awkward at times. to be honest though, i didn't mis him much, finding that i dont have all that much to say to him these days. Thr ride back from michigan on the other hand was actually really nice. granted there was an odd feeling in the air with C, K, wells clare and i all in the same car, being that wells clare and I don't like her much, but it was pretty relaxing. the three of us were snuggled together in C's backseat, nice and cozy. i miss that sort of thing, and it was just right to soothe the weirdnessthat came from being cooped in a cabin with twenty some other people. Then he and clare switched off driving and i had my two favorite chrises to nap with. god i love those boys. i love clare too, but i've known them longer. i'm glad that's how the ride ended, on an up note. though i did spend an hour sitting on the porch cuz i had no keys. so now i'm exhausted, enervated and bone weary. wish i had someone to cuddle with now. it's cold and cheap indiana cigarrettes will be the death of me.